


Vox Machina Lose a Pub Quiz

by Lordoflesamis



Series: Dive Bars and Dick Jokes- Modern Vox Machina [1]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Fluff, Hijinks & Shenanigans, M/M, Modern AU, Multi, Vox Machina starts as a shitty team quiz name, everyone is happy and alive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2018-09-06
Packaged: 2019-07-07 21:48:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15916911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lordoflesamis/pseuds/Lordoflesamis
Summary: The meeting of Vox Machina, just a bunch of people trying to adult and get on in the world. The group meets Vex and Vax, two ridiculously attractive individuals, Scanlan returns, much to the surprise of his old friends Pike and Grog- and everyone gets wasted. Based on nights I had at uni with my friends, this does not bode well for their success in the Pub Quiz.





	Vox Machina Lose a Pub Quiz

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Really just wanted to set the scene for a bunch of fics i'm planning to do with a modern AU i've had in my head for a while now- I really hope you enjoy, its just meant to be happy, rom-com based drama only, nothing too serious. Everyone is pining and everyone's a little bit gay. Enjoy!

Night had fallen without Percy’s knowledge or permission. He frowned, adjusting his glasses, as both the low light and exhaustion made reading his own notes difficult, before sighing and standing, chair scraping on the cheap wood of the floor. A chill ran through him then, as his body realised the time, and he shivered, sliding the blueprints into their drawer under his desk and grabbing his jacket from the back of his chair. 

He made the trip up the stairs, locking the door to the workshop on the way, and continued upwards onto street level. His new house stood above him now, in the silence of what he realised was around midnight, with one dim light on upstairs. Probably the hallway light, he figured, since Keyleth’s room faced the garden and Cassandra was usually asleep by now. 

He unlocked the door, yawning, and sighed gratefully as the warmth of their house hit his face. He went through the lounge, intending on getting a drink from the kitchen beyond it before bed, but was stalled by the sleeping form of Cassandra, curled on the sofa. She still wore her day clothes; a white blouse ruffled up under a navy dungaree dress, and one arm was tucked carefully underneath her for support. How she looked elegant even in sleep was beyond him. He removed his coat, laying it over her, and continued his journey, the hour too late and the scene too calm to move her. 

Keyleth’s room was dark and quiet. He could only just hear her faint snores as he passed by her door to the upstairs bathroom, brushing his teeth and staring his exhausted reflection in the face. Dark circles emphasised the startling blue of his eyes and the white of his hair, his pale skin doing nothing to hide his current state. Percy hadn’t slept in four days. He was running on sheer force of will at this point, and he was tired; truly tired. 

His bedroom was a state. There were plans for tinkering projects, pens, small metal parts, paint and even black powders- some of which were most certainly explosives of sorts- littered the furniture, staining his bedsheets. Three mugs of coffee dutifully grew cultures on his bedside table. He took his phone from his pocket and plugged it into the charger by his bed, throwing his body down on top of the clothes he had thrown there the day before. He put his glasses onto the bed-side table, and before he could even consider setting an alarm for the morning, fell asleep.

He was awoken some time later by gentle knocking on his door and Keyleth’s hesitant voice; “Percy? It’s almost six. We’re meant to be going to the pub for seven.” 

“Shit” Percy muttered, then a little louder, “Shit! Okay, thank you Keyleth.”

“No problem!” came the sunny reply, and her footsteps echoed down the hall to her room. Faint music came from the room beside him as Cassandra went about her day. Six PM. He had woken up at Six PM. What day was it?

Percy fumbled for his phone and grimaced- he’d slept for a day and a half. “Probably needed it.” He muttered, standing and getting dressed, deciding not to shower, instead spending that time making coffee in the biggest mug he could find. It wasn’t like he was meeting anyone special, after all. 

Keyleth was taking him to the pub quiz, to get him out of the house, really. They’d been doing it weekly for a couple of months now. Kima, Allura, Pike and Grog were going to be there, nobody new. He was glad for it: he was an anxious enough person as it was, he didn’t need the pressure of meeting new people after sleeping for eighteen hours and not showering in two days. 

“Ready to go?” Keyleth asked, putting in a dangling leaf-shaped earring. She wore a tight green tank top and a long floral-print skirt that swung around her ankles, which were neatly strapped into wedged sandals. Her bright red hair, recently cut short, bounced as she flung open the door, barely waiting for his reply.

Percy pulled on his signature blue coat and followed her, unaware that this night would change his life forever.

////

“Pike you are looking glorious this evening.” Scanlan’s voice made her jump, and Pike Trickfoot turned as slowly as possible, trying to neutralise her face, to come face to face with the man she hadn’t seen in what felt like years. 

“Why thank you Scanlan!” she said “But flattery won’t make me buy you a drink.”

Scanlan’s mouth fell open in dramatic hurt, “Why Miss Trickfoot,” he said, throwing his arm over his forehead, “You have wounded me. I would never give you a compliment as payment for a drink!” He grinned suddenly, “Maybe an orgasm as payment, but never a-” before she punched his shoulder, laughing.

“Scanlan!” Grog’s voice made him jump, tensing his shoulders, the opposite of Pike who had felt a relief of tension as her brother arrived. Before Scanlan could open his mouth to greet the giant of a man, however, he was lifted into a crushing bear hug, about two feet of the ground to be at eye-level with his friend.

“Grog!” he grinned as he was set down, not even a little embarrassed to be picked up so easily, “It’s been too long!”

“Only six fucking months!” Grog said through a grin, though sadness lingered in the air after he spoke.

Scanlan offered him a small smile, “I had something important to do. Come, I’ll get you and my future wife a drink.”

Pike, who had already bought both men a drink, rolled her eyes, “No, you come on, you can meet the rest of us.”

“Oh I wasn’t aware you were here with anyone,” Scanlan said, caution evident in his voice as he gently took his drink from her. She met his eyes, only for a moment, then looked back down at the drinks in her hands.

“Of course. I-we have friends other than you.” There was a kind of coldness in her voice Scanlan never wanted to hear again. 

He swallowed nervously, and tried to think of the right words to say. 

They had met some time ago, he and Pike Trickfoot, the love of his life. He had, of course, being him, been a bastard. She on the other hand, had looked, and behaved, perfect. It was love at first sight for him, then love at every sight, every word, every look ever since. 

“I like your new hair,” he said, a little quieter. 

Pike ran a hand through her platinum-blonde hair, which had been curled specially for this evening. “Thanks, Scanlan.” She said, and took a sip of her drink, smiling politely over the rim. 

Grog had already bounded over to their usual booth, where Kima greeted him with a roar and a clink of their pint glasses. Allura, her girlfriend, laughed and kissed Grog on the cheek, taking a sip of her cocktail as she sat back down. They were joined by a beautiful red-head with a similar drink to Allura, and a man Scanlan didn’t recognise with white hair and a tight smile, sipping a whisky and shaking Grog’s hand with a familiarity Scanlan felt a pang of jealousy over. 

Pike took him by the arm and the jealousy melted away, as did most of his worries. God he’d missed her.

“Hey everyone, you must’ve heard Grog talking about Scanlan Shorthalt.” Pike smiled, sinking into the seat beside Percy, who hugged her with one arm, and smiled politely at Scanlan, who felt a sudden twinge in his chest.

“Percival,” he said, stretching a hand out to Scanlan, “Any friend of Grog’s is a friend of ours.”

“Charmed,” Scanlan said, noting the posh accent in the new person, “I like your hair.” 

Percival looked a little put-out, as if he was afraid Scanlan was making fun of him. Which to be fair, he was. “Thank you.”

“Keyleth!” said the gorgeous ginger woman to Percy’s other side, leaping to her feet and shaking Scanlan’s hand, “Grog’s told us all about you!” 

“All bad things, I hope,” Scanlan said with a wink, laughing as she blushed, a little flustered.

“Ready to ace this pub quiz then?” Scanlan asked, nodding at Kima, who he knew, and Allura, who he didn’t, who both looked at him a little sceptically, as he sat down in the booth beside his best friend. 

“Of course!” Keyleth said, “We always win. Mainly because of Percy and Pike-“

“Nonsense,” Percy said, pushing his glasses up his nose. Pike beamed at Scanlan, taking a sip of her drink.

“Everyone ready?” The man running the quiz, a rotund, greasy man that made Scanlan’s skin crawl, said as he paced the small makeshift stage The Grey Skull Keep set up every week.

Just as they joined in the cheering, Keyleth writing “Vox Machina” on the top of their sheet, two incredibly attractive people walked in the pub- a man and a woman. The man stared about the room with a look of mild interest, while the woman glanced around with purpose, eyes settling on Keyleth, before grinning and heading towards the table, dragging the man along behind her.

“Vex! You made it!” Keyleth yelled, climbing over Pike and Percy to hug the woman, who yelled, “Darling!” in return.

Turning to the group, Keyleth smiled, “Guys, this is Vex! She works with me at the Zoo.”

“Hello,” she smiled, eyes running across them all before landing on Percy, and she winked.

On the outside, Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III gave her a polite smile, a nod of the head and told her his name. On the inside, Percy could hardly focus on breathing. It was as if everything else in the world had faded into darkness around the radiance of the woman before him. As she flicked her hair- raven black and so so silky, and winked one sparkling eye at him, his heart skipped a few beats, and he felt the sudden desire to give her anything and everything she wanted, no matter the cost. He swallowed- his mouth was dry- and took a few sips of his drink, trying to focus as the man- her brother by his looks- introduced himself. 

“So excited to finally win a pub quiz,” Vex said, sitting beside Scanlan, who offered her a wink of his own, making her laugh. She threw her head back in the gesture, and Percy swallowed his tongue. 

“You’re always too drunk normally to win, Stubby,” her brother said, and she hit him. 

“Drinks,” Keyleth said suddenly, “I’ll get you both drinks!” 

“Oh thank you darling,” Vex said, but Vax shook his head.

“No, no I’ll get ours.”

Keyleth waved her hand, “No it’s on me! Your sister’s been the greatest to me since-“

“I insist.” He said, then seemed to soften a little, “At least let me help you carry them.” 

Keyleth grinned, “Perfect!” 

As their figures retreated to the bar, one green and red the other completely black, Vex thought that her brother seemed a little unlike himself. But he was often weird around new people. 

“So, you work at the zoo?” Pike asked, interested. This woman seemed in many ways so different to Keyleth. Her hair was dark, long and straight- her skin was tan and her eyes and makeup were dark. She wore a big leather jacket and a black crop top, black ripped jeans and high heel boots, and a smirk that would give Scanlan a run for his money. 

Speaking of Scanlan… Pike took a gulp of her drink and took a moment as Vex told her about the bears at the zoo to study him. In the two months he’d been gone he’d got tanner. His hair was longer, and his eyes looked tired. But he looked like the same man she’d remembered, those nights she’d spent missing him.

Stupid. She told herself, then took another swig. Grog’s eyes met hers, and he gave her the concerned-brother-look that she hated and loved so much. “Shots anyone? To celebrate the start of the quiz?” She found herself blurting, a blush chasing the words to her face. 

“Shots? Pike Trickfoot you continue to amaze me,” Scanlan said, standing and going to get them, refusing to listen as she insisted she’d get them. 

“Shots?” Vex’ahlia said, “Now we’re talking. This is a proper pub quiz!”

“Question One,” the unpleasant man said, “Now we’re all here.” He pointedly looked to Vex  
and Vax, who laughed and flipped him the bird respectively, causing a light laugh among the other patrons, “Is a general knowledge question. Which spirit’s name, when translated into English, means Little Water?”

“I have literally no idea,” Vex said, “But that’s cute, I like it.”

“Vodka,” Allura said, taking a graceful sip of her cocktail, “I think it’s vodka.” 

“How could you know that? How could anybody know that?” Grog said, somewhat miserably, half way into his second pint. 

“I trust Allie!” Kima half-yelled (as always), downing her second pint. 

Pike lost count of their pints as she lost track of her own shots. The conversation had begun to flow, and she learnt that Vex’ahlia was flirtatious, funny and clever and her brother was mischievous, funny and almost as clever. She learnt that Scanlan had been playing music regularly with a woman he referred to solely by first name and for some reason, learnt that this made her chest hurt.

She did not, however, learn anything from anyone during the quiz save Allura’s first answer. As the drinks came and were done with, Keyleth’s handwriting slurred, and then after another round of jaeger bombs, stopped completely, and it was only after they’d missed an entire round of questions that Percy had noticed and picked up the slack. 

At one point, Grog had Vax lifted above the booth by his collar- but the manic grin on the newcomer’s face suggested that this was not so much a problem as an exciting new dynamic. Allura fell asleep. Keyleth started to cry. Kima and Grog arm-wrestled until their third tie-break. Pike herself was amazed at how fast the room could spin as she did something so simple as trade quiz sheets with the table beside theirs. 

“Vox Machina?” the man at the next table (far more sober than Pike) said with a slight sneer, “What kind of a Quiz name is that?”

Pike glared at him through her drunken haze, “What- what kinda… what kinda quiz name are YOU?”

And she snatched his sheet and sat back down, much to the amusement of Scanlan, who leant almost his entire body across the table to be face-to-face with her, “What kinda quiz name are you? Good one, Pikey.”

“Shut Up, Scanlan.” She said, and downed another drink.

“And the results are in,” the pub owner said, “In last place, winning the Booby Prize of free entry to next week, to try and redeem themselves…. Vox Machina!” 

It took a moment for the news to settle in- or perhaps for them to focus through their drunken haze. “Last?” Percy said, “We’ve never been last before.”

“I blame Vax!” Vex half-sang, falling towards her brother as she attempted to remain upright. He would have caught her- he usually caught her- had he not been lifted by a jubilant Grog, both cheering, “We lost! We Lost! We Lost!”

“Dumbass.” She snorted, turning to lean on Scanlan instead, who winked at Pike and mimed fanning himself. 

“I hate you.” She said, with a grin, before turning to Keyleth on the other side of Percy beside her, “Go on Kiki, go get the prize.”

“Oh I- er- do I have to?” 

“Kiki! Kiki! Kiki!” Pike began, knowing that her friend needed to be more confident. Slowly, once they heard what she was saying, she was joined by Grog and Vax, then Scanlan and Vex (after they’d taken a shot through each others’ arms), then Kima and finally Percy and Allura joined in as Keyleth slid out of the booth, face as red as her hair, and collected their commiseration prize. 

“T-thank you.” She stuttered, before practically running to come sit down.

“You know what this means?” Vax said, as soon as she got back, now seated once more between Grog and his sister.

“We suck at quizzes?” Percy suggested, laughing when Pike mock-punched him with a shout of Hey! 

“No- well, yeah but I mean- We have to redeem ourselves. I say we come back next week and win this thing!”

As the others agreed around them, both Percy and Pike kept their reservations to themselves. Percy worried that if he was around Vex any longer she’d learn he wasn’t “cool” and “so clever” as she’d described him twice tonight. Pike worried that if she was around Scanlan any longer she’d have to address why her chest hurt every time she saw him. 

But, as they added Vex and Vax to the group chat, both got the sneaking suspicion that things were far, far from over- and maybe that was a good thing.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave a comment if you liked it- or if you have constructive criticism too! I love getting feedback :D


End file.
